At some point we have to narrow down our aspirations. Pick from our field of dreams, a good noble dream and go forward.
Much like the match process, there is pain in letting go of the other dreams. In the medicine match you have 10-15 possible lives ahead. Yes, it's nice to find out which road you will be taking, but there is also pain in letting the other 11 go.
For me it was acting. The dream of going to NY or LA and pursuing an acting career. I also had a dream of a family. My senior year of college I chose to marry my love and for a while I thought I could have both my dreams.
I got a job working at a television station. It was not what I was really wanting to do. Along came a little baby and I quit my job. I found many opportunities to get involved in independent film. This was much closer to what I really wanted. Then another little blessing came along. I still kept hoping that residency or something would take us to LA.
I was at film festivals all over the region. I finally flew out to LA after the baby was born and tried to network and rub elbows with the right people. I had a great time, but it did not seem to further my acting career any.
I always planned to pursue acting until I turned 40, but at 33 years old, as a mother of 3 in Jacksonville, FL, I am finding that it is time for me to let that dream fizzle for the sake of my own happiness.
I am grateful that I've been so blessed in my dream of being deeply in love with my husband. I am also grateful for my 3 beautiful children. Like in the movie "17 Again," I don't know that if given the opportunity I would change a single thing.
Except buying that house in Tennessee.