At this point nearly all our combined siblings are in "real" jobs and are ready to spread the Christmas Cheer. Here we are in year 11. Year 11 of "I'm sorry this year we can only afford to give kids gifts." I feel like a broken record.
Resident salaries do not pay enough to buy round trip tickets for 5. In a way I am happy to be away in our Residency home for the holidays. Our siblings can't go buy us a surprise gift the night before Christmas and make me feel like a jerk for only getting kid gifts.
Another nice thing is that we get to have Christmas morning at our own home. Chad's family is like Peter Pan's Neverland. The adults continue to be kids and their kids are just more to add to the bunch.
I was always sad that we would have Christmas Morning and then the kids were ready to head over to the Grandparents house to have "real" Christmas morning and get their "real" gifts, which were nicer than anything we could afford to give them.
Being away from home means that all the presents are stationed at our house so we get to have the "real" Christmas morning. I guess I'm just eager to build my childrens' Christmas memories rather than keep reliving my husband's.
I DREAM of the day I can buy lovely gifts for all my siblings and the kids all long to open the gift from Aunt Stacie and Uncle Chad because they know it's going to be something really good!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Flowers for Algernon Phenomenon (Taboo Subject Warning)
In the story “Flowers for Algernon” Charlie falls in love with his former teacher, Miss Kinnian, but as his intelligence increases, he surpasses her intellectually and they become unable to relate to each other.
Story Summary http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/algernon/summary.html
Once med school was over and I began being invited to the “real” doctors wives group in town I noticed something. These long-time wives seemed to have a common thread. It seemed like every Dr. Wife I met was a doctor herself, a pharmacist, a lawyer, an optometrist or a dentist. (I’m sure there were exceptions to this rule; I just didn’t meet any.)
I had thought myself sufficiently educated. I had worked a while after college and gone back for my masters and finished that up the May before medical school started.
I won’t lie. I felt SERIOUSLY undereducated around this crowd. So undereducated that I studied for and took the LSAT thinking I would at least get a Juris Doctorate. But with 3 small children at home this was a pipe dream, and I gave it up.
I mention “Flowers for Algernon” because I thought of this story frequently while Chad was in Medical School. He seemed so young and at times VERY immature his first year of medical school. I was by far the mature adult in the relationship.
The process was gradual. As medical school went on and he started residency he became quite different. Not only did he gain knowledge and wisdom, he gained maturity. Family and friends call him for advice now frequently and I turn to him for advice as well. I literally felt him passing me by intellectually.
Let me just say many of the smartest people I know personally never went or finished college. However, I am curious if anyone else has felt insecure about our husband surpassing us in education?
Will he get bored with my childish blabbering and go marry someone else he can have a real conversation with?
On the other hand, I did notice that he named his fantasy football team “Huge Hairy Ball Sack.” Perhaps I don’t have anything to worry about.
Story Summary http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/algernon/summary.html
Once med school was over and I began being invited to the “real” doctors wives group in town I noticed something. These long-time wives seemed to have a common thread. It seemed like every Dr. Wife I met was a doctor herself, a pharmacist, a lawyer, an optometrist or a dentist. (I’m sure there were exceptions to this rule; I just didn’t meet any.)
I had thought myself sufficiently educated. I had worked a while after college and gone back for my masters and finished that up the May before medical school started.
I won’t lie. I felt SERIOUSLY undereducated around this crowd. So undereducated that I studied for and took the LSAT thinking I would at least get a Juris Doctorate. But with 3 small children at home this was a pipe dream, and I gave it up.
I mention “Flowers for Algernon” because I thought of this story frequently while Chad was in Medical School. He seemed so young and at times VERY immature his first year of medical school. I was by far the mature adult in the relationship.
The process was gradual. As medical school went on and he started residency he became quite different. Not only did he gain knowledge and wisdom, he gained maturity. Family and friends call him for advice now frequently and I turn to him for advice as well. I literally felt him passing me by intellectually.
Let me just say many of the smartest people I know personally never went or finished college. However, I am curious if anyone else has felt insecure about our husband surpassing us in education?
Will he get bored with my childish blabbering and go marry someone else he can have a real conversation with?
On the other hand, I did notice that he named his fantasy football team “Huge Hairy Ball Sack.” Perhaps I don’t have anything to worry about.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Where NOT to live
Lately, like since residency started, Dr.H and I have gone round and round about where we want to settle. The only thing I know for sure is anywhere we look is either:
Too Hot
Too Cold
Too Expensive
So I would love any feedback you could give me on anywhere I should definitely take OFF our list of future hometowns.
I'll start. The worst place medicine has taken us is Oklahoma City. It's windy, it's ugly, the people were... uggh... Okay, so the ladies I met in Junior League were super, but the people I met a church were bizarre. My biggest fear for match day was seeing Oklahoma City anywhere on that piece of paper.
Where is the worst place medicine, or life, has taken you?
Too Hot
Too Cold
Too Expensive
So I would love any feedback you could give me on anywhere I should definitely take OFF our list of future hometowns.
I'll start. The worst place medicine has taken us is Oklahoma City. It's windy, it's ugly, the people were... uggh... Okay, so the ladies I met in Junior League were super, but the people I met a church were bizarre. My biggest fear for match day was seeing Oklahoma City anywhere on that piece of paper.
Where is the worst place medicine, or life, has taken you?
Thursday, November 18, 2010
The New Girl ... again
In a perfect world our Dr.H would go to med school close to home, stay there for residency and go into practice in our hometown and we move into the house across the street from our parents.
I was talking to a good friend, resident wife, who we’ll call Jane Fairfax today. This woman is one most elegant women I have come across in my life: kind, beautiful, down to Earth and smart.
She was sharing with me her struggle being the new girl in her new community. It dawned on me that if Jane Fairfax, whom I imagine some women might give their right arm to call a friend, was having trouble being the new girl, she can’t be the only one.
As the wife of the resident we are too often the new girl. We were the new girl at med school. Now we are the new girl in the location of the residency. We’ll be the new girl yet again in 4-8 years.
Has anyone found anything that helps with this “new” experience. Is there any way to make the “new” thing less painful?
I was talking to a good friend, resident wife, who we’ll call Jane Fairfax today. This woman is one most elegant women I have come across in my life: kind, beautiful, down to Earth and smart.
She was sharing with me her struggle being the new girl in her new community. It dawned on me that if Jane Fairfax, whom I imagine some women might give their right arm to call a friend, was having trouble being the new girl, she can’t be the only one.
As the wife of the resident we are too often the new girl. We were the new girl at med school. Now we are the new girl in the location of the residency. We’ll be the new girl yet again in 4-8 years.
Has anyone found anything that helps with this “new” experience. Is there any way to make the “new” thing less painful?
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Free Trips to Conferences
Lately it seems like all the residents around here are scoring free trips to really cool places. My friend Lori just got back from San Diego with her Dr.H for a conference where he was a "delegate." Now they are turning around and heading to NYC on another trip courtesy of the Mayo Clinic for him to present a case report.
So far we haven't gotten to benefit from the whole conference thing, but we are planning to go to Vancouver in May for Dr.H to present a case report.
Has anyone else gotten to go to a conference in a cool place, courtesy of the residency program? Was it fun or a bore?
So far we haven't gotten to benefit from the whole conference thing, but we are planning to go to Vancouver in May for Dr.H to present a case report.
Has anyone else gotten to go to a conference in a cool place, courtesy of the residency program? Was it fun or a bore?
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
One Cool Thing about Residency
So, here's the thing - I LOVE the free recruitment dinners!!!! Going on "date night" is nearly impossible during this season considering walking out the door is about $20-$40 in babysitting off the bat. Then add the cost of a date (at least $30 for dinner + any activity) and you're better off picking something up from RedBox and putting the kids to bed early.
I love the recruitment dinners because all I have to pay for is the babysitter. Yea, you've got to shoot the breeze with strangers and be on your best behavior, but HEY, I'm at home and never have anyone to talk to anyways, so it's cool.
It's one little perk I appreciate.
I love the recruitment dinners because all I have to pay for is the babysitter. Yea, you've got to shoot the breeze with strangers and be on your best behavior, but HEY, I'm at home and never have anyone to talk to anyways, so it's cool.
It's one little perk I appreciate.
Monday, November 15, 2010
The Wrong Mailing List
Dr.H did his first year of residency in surgery. Boy was that a doosey! Since then he has been constantly recruited for surgery positions via mail.
This is not what we want. We want him to be recruited in Anesthesiology! Any ideas for how to get on the right mailing list for his specialty?
This is not what we want. We want him to be recruited in Anesthesiology! Any ideas for how to get on the right mailing list for his specialty?
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